So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
