I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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