Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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