i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
