then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
even my farts smell like vagina
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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