pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
