how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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