There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
