Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize
