you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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