I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Soap is not a condiment
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
