dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Let's get the cat blown out
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
