There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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