watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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