Nicole vs. Life
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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