why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Boobs are out for the taking
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
