Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
