i permit you to call me
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
