We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
