It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'm too high and old for this...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize