Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
