Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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