just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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