it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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