so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a beard to bite.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize