Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
