Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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