trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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