Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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