yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
