This show inspires me to have sex in space
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
