Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
