I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
