I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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