covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
