i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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