Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
