...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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