We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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