i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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