Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
