I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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