I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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