I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
