so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
