Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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