Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
