I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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