do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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