let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
