your thong is hanging out like whoa
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
