Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize